Archive for the 'Bloggy' Category

State of the Union

I recently took an audition for the Saint Paul Chamber Orchestra. Theoretically, I should have been gunning for that job. It’s in my dream location, it’s an ensemble I grew up admiring, and my wonderful teacher Alice Preves played there. But I wasn’t gunning for the job. I was going through the very familiar motions of taking an audition. I did work hard. I was well prepared. I just never emotionally and mentally committed to the process. When I got done with the first round, in which I played respectably, but not particularly well, I realized something very amazing: I’m done with this. I’m done with auditions. I no longer see the value in spending my time, energy, and money on auditions. I’m happy in Buffalo. I have a wonderful life. I’m done prioritizing something that doesn’t make me happy. Auditions are stupid.

Rather than this being a depressing realization, it’s been absolutely liberating. I’m happier at work, I’m less angsty in general, and I feel fully committed to my life in Buffalo. Fully committed. As in: this is the life that I choose. Someday I might choose another life, but when and if I do, I will be choosing that life, not some audition committee behind a screen choosing me. For the first time in my entire life, I can honestly say, I do not give one flying fuck what the people behind the screen think of me.

This attitude has led to some interesting changes in other aspects of my life, including the one I am here to talk to you about: blogging. Writing Oh For Fun was the first time in my life when I found myself earnestly working on something over a sustained period of time that wasn’t the viola. Blogging has played a huge role in my life over the last two years. I have found a voice that I was previously trying to channel into the viola; only this voice came with absolutely no baggage. I haven’t been blogging since I was a child. I didn’t major in blogging at Oberlin. I haven’t used blogging my entire life as a measuring stick of my success. I felt no need to prove anything to anyone with my blog. There was no blogging committee sitting behind a screen, waiting to catch a mistake so they can kick me off the internet. Blogging has been the easiest thing I have ever done, and it’s also the thing I’ve worked the hardest on (which is shocking when you realize I’ve been practicing the viola since I was seven).

Oh For Fun has been the musings of my internal mind. I have used this platform to hone a voice, and to practice writing, to try things out, to share myself, to work hard, and to make my friends and family laugh. It’s been an absolute joy, and I don’t think I could ever overestimate how much this platform has fundamentally changed how I measure my potential and my happiness. Blogging has been incalculably good for me.

The Willful Caboose, is my first baby step out of my own head, and into the world at large with my writing. With TWC I am attempting to use the skills I have cultivated here, and actively apply them to something specific, something that has an appeal beyond “Kate Holzemer”. I am working on TWC with incredible devotion, and it is paying off in terms of traffic and interest in the blog. I have no idea what a hockey blog can lead to exactly, but I can say that it has already provided amazing friends, a refocused creativity, TONS of laughs, and an absolute fascination with how the medium of “blogging” has the potential to change the way we receive and share information. Oh For Fun has felt intensely personal, and The Willful Caboose has felt like presenting a “product”- a product that I am very proud of and that I feel has potential to evolve and grow.

I am so sorry that I have not been keeping up with Oh For Fun. I can’t tell you how much it means to me that people miss it, and want it back. I just don’t know how to manufacture my enthusiasm. I tried with Nambloogooho, but it just felt incredibly forced. I don’t want Oh For Fun to ever feel like the audition screen, and so rather than trying to propel myself through the motions of blogging here, I am choosing to let it be. I’m not quitting Oh For Fun, I’m just channeling my energy into The Willful Caboose right now. I’m certain that someday the pendulum will swing back.

The reason I have written this big long post is that I desperately want you guys, the people who have always so generously read Oh For Fun, to understand how much your support has meant to me, and how responsible I still feel to this blog and to the people who read it. I am happier, more peaceful, and more confident today than I have been in 32 years, and I really believe that a lot of this contentment started here, on Oh For Fun, with you. I love you guys.

Good Morning

It worked well to blog in the early morning yesterday, so I’m going to try it again today and see if it sticks.

A few days ago, my friend Mike sent this YouTube gem along. It is always hilarious to watch classical music “performed” on a television show, and this is one of the best examples I have ever seen. This is the Brahms B flat sextet being performed by four people, two of which seem to be violists. That’s right. The piece is for six, but on the Starship Enterprise, they can play it with only four. Also, I think that Data is a Vulcan or something, which makes his stirring performance of the violin part (“played”on a viola) extra special. Three of the performers are actors, but for some reason, they hired an actual cello player to play the part of “Cellist”. (Wouldn’t that be an awesome gig?) Add in the fact that there seems to be some sort of emotional breakthrough occurring with one of the toga wearing audience members, and the whole thing is just delightful.

This is How It’s Gonna Be!

So!  It worked!  I convinced all of you guys to join me at Nabloobleeblonkbloba!  HA! (suckers)  If you haven’t done so yet, please officially sign up.  If we are all official than we can be friends and maybe even form some sort of Super Rad blogger group. 

Last year when I did this
, I worked very hard to produce a quality post every day, and I did in fact write a few things that I like.  I wouldn’t hold my breath for the quality posts this year, people.  I am busy, yo.  I’m practicing hard.  I have hockey to watch and casseroles to eat.   You can expect lots of picture posts, and lots of "I can’t think of anything to write posts", and lots of "I hate Nahoodomugoo" posts.  For the month of November, Oh For Fun! is the McDonald’s of blogging.  Fast, cheap, and nutritionally suspect. 

Take today for example.

Remember Me?

Hi guys!  Remember me? 

I have been feeling a bit badly about my floundering first born, Oh For Fun.  In an effort to revuvinate this blog, I have signed up for NaBloFloBooBllaMo again. (See my new blog over there?) I’ll be blogging everyday in November, God willing.  Last year I was pretty motivated to do this, and blogging everyday really wasn’t too challenging.  Not every post was a winner, but I didn’t struggle too much to get the job done. This year I anticipate a LOT more internal resistance, but I will bravely forge ahead.  I WILL blog every day in November.

I think the following people should blog everyday too:

Courtney
(She’s doing it for Ashok!)
Shalini (she’s in on the condition that Courtney does it too.)
Charlie (Charlie is still playing hard to get!)
Miriam (She’s in, but sh’e cranky about it! :P)
Ashley (she’s in!  Whoooo-ooooo!)
Pretty (She’s in!  Hooray!)
Christina (Christina is pretending she doesn’t know me!)

Come on, guys!  Get on board!  Misery loves company after all.  Heh.

*update*

Sam has to do it too!

**Update!**

Shalini says she’ll do it, but only if Courtney does it too; so basically, if Courtney doesn’t do it everyone will be hugely disappointed.   She’ll be ruining the fun for everyone and Ashok will be so sad that he’ll cry for weeks. Hee!

Presenting….

The Willful Caboose, my new hockey blog. 

Fear not hockey-haters of Oh For Fun!  It’s all going to be okay.

Oh For Hockey!

I have a little dilemma I want to broach with you, dear readers.  For the last few weeks I have been mulling over starting a second blog devoted to hockey and sports. (I know, I know……stay with me here for a second, Courtney. I promise this post won’t be about hockey. I PROMISE.) I have become pretty active in a few sporty corners of the interwebs, and now I feel I simply must create my own place for blabbing about hockey. My need and intention to blog about hockey is non-negotiable. It’s going to happen. So, the question is, should I do it here, or at a new blog?

I’m scared that if I start a new blog, Oh For Fun will suffer, but I’m scared that if I start rambling about sports on Oh For Fun, my dear readers will suffer. Can my already fragile and taxed online personality survive a split? What do you think, guys? Two blogs?- or one blog that is only interesting to you half the time? I am desperate for your approval, so be honest. I aim to please.

(Note: if I start a second blog, you do not have to read it. Really. The entire reason for an additional blog is to shield innocent people from sports.)

I Love the Interwebs

A Ridiculous Day
by Kate Holzemer

10:30: wake-up
10:30: make coffee.  shower.  put on reasonable outfit.  look at the interwebs and comment repeatedly on IPB.  Read hilarious things. 
12:45: spill coffee on laptop!  Laptops sputters and shuts down.  My baby is drowning!  Freak out and run to public library because without the use of a computer I don’t know how to get in contact with Apple Support.  (it never even occurs to me to use the telephone.)
1:00: wind up looking at the interwebs at the public library.  completely fail to solve coffee/laptop problem.  fail to reach anyone at Apple.  decide Apple customer support is maybe not as effing fabulous as they want me to believe.  have perfectly enjoyable time looking at interwebs at the public library.
2:30: leave library and purchase sandwich at Globe market.  this is the first bite of food I eat all day.
2:45: arrive back home and eat sandwich, sadly eye laptop. 
3:00: laptop is cured!  miraculous recovery!  vow never to eat or drink near laptop again.
3:01: enjoy a diet coke and a Fudgesicle while looking at the interwebs.
4:00: practice viola.
5:00: look at interwebs.
5:30: practice viola
5:37: give up on having anything resembling a respectable day.  Put on sweatpants and a t-shirt with a hole in the armpit.  look at interwebs
7:00: Begin cooking current favorite meal, Chick-Pea Delight.  Realize that I only have twenty grains of rice left.  Cook twenty last remaining grains of rice. 
7:30: Eat Chick-pea Delight served over a "bed" of twenty grains of rice.  It’s delightful as usual, even without a reasonable amount of rice.
8:00: look at interwebs
9:00: decide that after such a strenuous day I would like to get some early shut-eye. take two Tylenol PMs.
9:15: think to self, "I should feel guilty for having such a ridiculous day." 
9:16: think to self, "I don’t feel guilty.  I feel as though I kick ass." 
9:17: smile smugly.

The End