Archive for August, 2007

Water Buffaloes KICK ASS!

Dude, this video is SO AWESOME. I normally can’t stand footage of animals attacking and eating one another, but trust me this is worth a look. Don’t worry, it has a happy ending! (For some reason, when I was watching this video it kept stopping and going back to the beginning. If this happens to you, DON’T GIVE UP! The video is over 8 minutes long. Keep your eye on the timer and make sure you see the whole clip. Basically, if you are not completely amazed, you haven’t seen the whole thing.)

Thank you, Amy for the heads up on this video.

God Bless Miss Teen America

This has been making the internet rounds today, and…..whoa. I can’t believe this actually happened. Make sure to notice Slater’s (the host’s) expression at the very end of the clip. He’s barely keeping it together. I have transcribed the event for your enjoyment.

Q: Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can’t locate the US on a world map. Why do you think this is?

A: I perSONally belieeeve, thaaat U.S. Americans are unable to do sooo becAUse, uh, sooo-me people, out there in our nation, don’t hAVe maps…and, uh, I believe that our education, like such as South Africaaa and The Eye-rack everywhere, like, such as… and, I believe that theeey shoooould, uh, our education over HERE, in the U.S. should help the U.S., or should help South Africa, it should help The Eye-rack and the Asian countrieees, so that we will be able to build up our future. For our…

Slater: Thank you very much, South Carolina.

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I think she makes some very good points. Everyone deserves a map.

Tofulicious

My entire life I have been extremely susceptible to food cravings. (I would make a horrifying pregnant lady.) I’m not talking about your typical chocolate cravings, or the occasional need to eat a greasy fast food meal, I’m talking about an entire month where all I really want to eat are canned black olives (the big, whole kind).

Until now, the most sustained food craving I have ever experienced was shortly after I moved to Buffalo when I ate an avocado every day for about three months. Of course I also ate other things during my avocado phase, but really, only an avocado could satisfy my true hunger during that time. Eventually I got sick of avocados, and my interest dwindled. I have always figured that when my body really insists on a particular food, that food must contain some element of nutrition that I am lacking. Every one of the cravings I have experienced over my life have been, for the most part, reasonably healthy. (It’s not like I’m calling my current obsession with Fudgesicles a craving. No, that’s just plain old gluttony.) While I don’t think it’s good to eat avocados every day for your entire life, I don’t believe I sustained any long term damage from my avocado binge in 2001.

My current intense craving is tofu. After a lifetime of relative indifference, suddenly all I want to eat is tofu. I wish I could say that my interest in tofu is part of an overall move towards a healthier meal plan, but no, that is really not the case. I’m not choosing tofu over meat because I am trying to be a pious; I am choosing it because something deep down inside of me is demanding that I do so. I realized last night that I have been craving tofu for about a month, so it’s official: I’m in my Tofu Phase.

The trouble with tofu is I really don’t know how to cook with it, and I also don’t know where to begin looking for recipes. So, Dear Readers, I turn to you for ideas. Do you have any cherished tofu recipes? Can you recommend any good cookbooks? To give you an idea of my tastes, I will just say this: If there is one thing I HATE, it’s that vegetarian style of cooking that doesn’t have any fat or flavor and all it is is a big pile of disgusting vegetable mush. *shudder* For example, I have over the years tried to make recipes out of the original Moosewood Restaurant cookbook, and for the most part, I have hated them all. I’m not looking to be healthy. I’m just looking for a delicious way to shove more tofu down my throat.

Please advise.

Holy Mother of God

So, I’m tooling around the internet, and I go to one blog, and then I click to another blog, and then follow a link that promises "the most disturbing thing ever", which leads me to a photography company that specializes in digitally enhancing head shots for child beauty pageant contestants….and it is in fact, the most disturbing thing I’ve ever seen.  The site is just shot after shot of little girls, dressed like adults, in full make-up, and then airbrushed within an inch of their lives.  I, of course, look at the whole site, alternately vomiting and laughing hysterically. 

I am not linking to the site here, because it’s that wrong, but I do want to share my "favorite" photo.  I figure that the child in question was too young to have been permanently damaged by the photo shoot that lead to this picture.  I have no doubt that in time, this young girl’s happiness will be ruined by her insane mother, but as of the taking of this photo, she is still an innocent baby.

Are you ready?

Scroll down, and behold.

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creepy baby

Words fail me.

I mean, how do you even get a baby to make this expression?  Her mouth is saying, "I’m a happy baby!", but her eyes (dear God, those terrible eyes) are saying, "This bow on my head is so effing embarrassing.  I can’t believe that crazy bitch pierced my ears.  Save me."  

Vote For Glenn!

Not only am I suddenly obsessed with the Sabres, but so is Glenn!
My version of taking things to the extreme is to start a hockey blog.
Glenn’s version of taking things to the extreme is to enter the “Sabres
Emcee” competition…..and to GET TO THE FINAL 20!! Dudes, Glenn and I
are taking over the Buffalo sports scene! (Which is quite possibly the
funniest statement ever uttered. Really.)

  The reasons to vote for Glenn are 5-fold

1. Hilarious
2. Handsome
3. Fearless
4. Sabre obsessed
5. Willing to hit on players on behalf of all straight women/gay men.

I can pretty much guarantee that if Glenn becomes the Sabres Emcee, hilarity will ensue.

So, go here, watch Glenn’s video, and vote!  Vote early!  Vote often!  You won’t be sorry!

(In the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit that I haven’t
yet seen Glenn’s video due to the refusal of my computer to play any
video from NHL websites. All I can tell you is that every day I don’t see that video is a day I die a little more inside.)

Baby Mattie

Look at this baby.  This is three week old Mattie Cecilia, Debby and John’s beautiful new daughter.  I met her this afternoon and she was a perfect little lady.  She didn’t make a peep and she slept the entire time.

Mattie 1

While I held Mattie, Debby kept me laughing hysterically with stories from her delivery and the first few nights at home.  Debby has such a wonderful disposition for motherhood.  Everything that doesn’t make her cry, makes her laugh!

Look at Mattie’s long fingers.  She’ll be a musician for sure.

<Mattie 2

 

The Willful Caboose is the Balm!

In some online correspondence this afternoon, a friend used the expression "the bomb", as in, "Kate, your new hockey blog, The Willful Caboose is the bomb!" (Okay, that’s not exactly what he said.  Truthfully, he didn’t mention my blog at all.  My point is simply that he said "the bomb".)  I have a funny relationship with the expression "the bomb" particularly when I see it written out, because for years I wasn’t sure if it was "the bomb", or "the balm".

Say them out loud. 

"The bomb."  "The balm."

I’m telling you, it could go either way.

To this day, I think the expression "the balm" makes more sense.  Balm (as in, lip) really is the bomb.